Thursday, April 16, 2015

The Top 10 Reasons LOTRO is the One MMO to Rule Them All

Disclaimer: This is a non-scientific and completely un-serious list. Any resemblance of this list to any serious list, living or dead, is strictly coincidental. Anyone who thinks this list was meant to be taken seriously should not be taken seriously and flogged with a wet noodle for good measure.

10)  You don't need a scientific calculator and a minor in trigonometry to figure out how the stat system works.

9)  Pie! I know of no other MMO which features pie. I don't know how they do it.

8)  We have hobbits! They're great for a laugh, getting into trouble, baking pie, and doubling as footballs.

7)  Festivals! Because nothing says "The world is in danger of ending and we're all about to become the unwilling slaves of a giant fiery eyeball" like gathering a bouquet of marigolds.

6)  No Kung Fu pandas. Seriously, people. Were-bears? That's totally different.

5)  Turbine Points. Name for me anywhere else you could say, "Hey, I just used the last of my TP," or "I'm swimming in TP," or "Boy, am I excited! I'm about to buy a bunch of TP!" and be taken seriously.

4)  We have an Academy Award-winning movie series on our side (Does anyone even remember the Dungeons and Dragons movie? Let's hope not.). Bonus: our lead actors didn't receive Razzies, either.

3)  Our story doesn't rely on memory-wiping to resolve any horrendous inconsistencies in the plotline. I know it sounds like I'm referring to The Young and the Restless there, but I'm not.

2)  Space travel may not be our strong suit, but we still know parsecs measure distance, not time.

1)  No rifts to alternate dimensions popping up and spewing evil-doers all over the place in the LOTRO universe. The cosmic fabric of our space-time continuum is perfectly fine, thank you very much. Now, get off my lawn!

Master of Toons

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